Work-the funniest, most disturbing place on planet Earth

I work at, well, work. Here is just a short synopsis of the oh so many wonderful things we do:

Week 4 on the job: Me and co-worker play in the aisle ways, throwing paper balls and climbing shelves.

Week 6: I am hence known as "ponytail girl" aka: giggles. Courtesy of Satan.

Week 12: I "kindly remind" (he thinks it's "threatening") my co-worker of the dangers he could encounter at work.

Week 18: My co-worker begins the endless onslaught of throwing books at me when I least expect it.

Week 20: Co-worker calls me a fat dancing machine.

Week 23: Co-worker "accidently" runs me over with a cart while I'm sleeping in an aisle way and begins to throw everything within reach, including books and soda cans, at me.

Week 29: I "kindly remind" my co-worker of the dangers of leaving his drink unattended.

Week 43: Another game of catch. I put on a crown, stick a fake spider in my hair, and begin to roll around my work in a rolling chair.

Week 44: My boss sees me glide out of the back room kneeling on a chair, does a double take and calls me crazy. Can't say I blame him.

Week 56: My co-workers lock me in a closet for two hours. I finally realize I have my work's number and contact one of my bosses. She rescues me. They argue that they "blocked", not locked, me in the closet.

Week 57: Someone leaves chicken on a co-worker's desk. We search for the culprit.

Week 58: One of my co-workers puts hand sanitizer on top of another co-worker's doll's heads.

Week 59: We play Rock Band...ALL week.

Week 70: I roll around on the electrical weelchair ("scooter"), honking the horn, advising people we're closed.

Week 77: I sabotage my bosse's (Satan's[he was born on 6.6.66]) desk: counter set to 666, chair wrapped in caution tape, the book "the Devil and His Son" set in his chair. He loves it, I deny all knowledge and then confess, and he compliments me on the touch of the book. Me and my other boss plot to paint the break room pink and hang up smiley's everywhere, just for Satan.

Week 86: My co-workers decide that if I could be any T.V. show, I would be "That Girl". Look it up.

Week 87: I go to ask my boss a question. He asks me what I want, commenting that he knows that smile. He he. :)

Week 92: I'm caught licking cake off of a napkin after eating the cake...I was hungry.


Disclaimer: While all of the events are factual occurences, the dates/weeks are not, they are just guestimated.